Reflection on friendliness

From the age of 7 until 17 I lived with my family in Frankfurt.  My sister and I attended German schools and we worshiped with the small Mennonite congregation that met at the MCC building.  My father was MCC director for Europe and N.Africa and my mother sent parcels to Russia on behalf of their relatives in Canada and USA.

This past week we visited friends from those old times, the Iserts.  When both Rebecca and I commented on how much opener and friendlier Germans are nowadays compared to in the 1950's to 70's (when I was at G. university), they wondered if that was perhaps that now we are living in the Palatinate and not in big city Frankfurt.  Perhaps for Germans it has been a gradual change, but for us the difference is stark:

1.  While strangers still address each other with the formal "Sie", many younger persons will address a stranger of similar age (20's & 30's)  with the informal "Du".  And within the Mennonite church almost all persons use "Du".

2.  We've witnessed numerous times of strangers engaging in brief friendly conversations on public transportation.

3.  Store personnel in department stores still can be aloof and unhelpful, but we've encountered ever so many who have gone out of their way to be helpful and friendly.  (We came with extremely low expectations in this regard, based on long time ago experience.)

4.  We've had strangers go out of their way to come up to us and ask if they can give us directions or help in some way.  Last week in Mainz Rebecca, Peter, Jack and I were walking down a small side street on our way to the Gutenberg Museum.  A woman in her 50's stopped and asked if we needed help finding our way.  We'd been speaking English.  When we quickly said no, we knew the way, she paused for a while and welcomed us to her city, told us we shouldn't miss the market going on at the square, etc...  Of course Jack asked her some questions like was she born in Mainz.  She answered everything in a relaxed manner and then wished us a good day sightseeing.

5.  We realize there is prejudice and distrust in every country, but we have been first hand witnesses to the opposite.  It has been particularly worthy of attention because often older Germans have been involved.  We've seen a 60 something woman start a conversation with a 20-something foreign woman and her boyfriend on a bus.  They all got off and then went their separate ways.  We've seen an older German man help a foreign woman with her baby carriage, and talk in a very friendly manner with her kids.   I could go on and many of these experiences have been in large cities like Hamburg and Berlin.

6.  The foreigners here also respond in very warm and friendly ways, which is also different than the early guestworkers in the 1960's, who often whistled and made lewd comments.  I've experienced nothing but polite interchanges.

7.  Even in and outside of church we're delighted at how open and engaging the Mennonites here are.  We're enjoying learning to know them and getting into different congregations.   This past Sunday we attended church in Enkenbach.

I took the picture below before the start of the service.  There were about 50-60 in attendance.

This church built an addition on in such a way that everyone passes the coffee table on their way out.  This makes for a lot of conversation after church.

And even outside people continued to linger and visit (a whole hour later!) .  The lovely weather contributed to the gregarious atmosphere.